was outside his house just now. with xiao yan while waiting for my parents. it brought back quite alot of suppressed memories. memories that i tot were forgotten already. i could see him in his room. most probably doing his art. been a long time since i last contacted him. not that im trying to reconciliate or anything. im happy the way we are. maybe just wanna be friends with him?
anyway. been thinking alot recently. what defines sexual orientation? is it just the sinple what turns u on more? or is there a much deeper meaning? personally, sexual orientation does depend on who turns u on more. thats to a certain extent. u can probably go out with a girl when u're turned on by guys can u? however. sexual orientation is not based just on that. its also based on how u're interested in. this does no include sexual attraction for that matter. just pure feelings. does that make me a bi now or a gay?
even if i were to go out with a girl now. it would definately be based on feelings. and it would be extremely unfair towards her now. definition. grrrs. why are things so difficult to define? haven't had these thoughts before. this is the first time. i guess i wasn't that sure yet.
